I know every parent thinks they have the cutest child because that is exactly how I feel about my beautiful baby. When I think of M, I think of the lyrics, "kissable, huggable, loveable, unbelievable!" because she is all of those things to me. M has the ability to make me genuinely smile and laugh on a daily basis. I feel so honored to be her mother and have the ability to watch her grow, learn, and mature. My heart is overflowing with gratitude for this perfect gift God has entrusted me with.
I find it interesting that it seems to be more and more popular not to want children these days. People think they cost too much and take too much time. Also, according to some, children are seen as a trap or a prison-cell. Although I have no doubt some parents sadly feel this way about their children, I definitely do not. Raising M has been one of the most exciting adventures of my lifetime. The ability to create human life is absolutely incredible; to be able to watch part of my genetic make-up develop and grow into another person is indescribable. It is absolutely baffling the way life begins as a single cell and grows into a intelligent human being all in 9 months time. I have a hard time understanding why anyone wouldn't want to experience such a unique experience, but that's just my personal feelings.
However, I would have to say that the hardest part of being a mother is the pain that comes from seeing M be in pain or the pain that comes from the thought of losing her. To love someone as much as a mother loves a child creates some powerful feelings of joy but equally powerful feelings of pain. I can't imagine losing M. To all those parents who have lost children, I admire your strength and faith to keep going and living a happy life despite your heartache. I'd have to say that that would be the only reason I wouldn't want to be a mother. Just the fear of loving a person that much and losing them even for a short time period seems to be too much of a sacrifice.
Anyway, frequently during the day I whisper to M, "I love you, Sweetheart." If she ever reads this post, I hope she knows that it is essential she knows that I love her tenderly and am grateful for her bright and happy personality in our home. I look forward to all the memories that we will make together and I will remember with fondness all the memories we already have.
I love you Sweetheart!